I think we can all agree that one of the biggest sacrifices made in the Bible, before Jesus came, was when Abraham laid his son on the alter. I cannot begin to imagine or fathom what he must have been feeling. Sometimes we tend to look at the people in the Bible as a "character". The truth is ......they were REAL people with REAL emotions. Working in the church, I have seen many people who have lost loved ones, but there is NOTHING like seeing someone lose a child! I'm a mom and I refuse to even think about losing one of my children. The pain would be too intense. The amazing thing is that Abraham loved God enough that he was willing to do what God asked of him. Isaac was Abraham's dream. Having a son was a dream to him and God called Abraham to lay it down on the alter and sacrafice his dream. Give it back- no questions asked. I'm beginning this blog like this because I THINK God is asking something of me.
For quite some time now, I have had a growing heart for the nations. Years ago I was in an organization called YWAM. YWAM stands for Youth With A Mission. It's a HUGE mission organization with locations all over the world and they are equipping missionaries to go into ALL the world and take the gospel. When I was in YWAM, I began to get a heart for the world. Due to circumstances, I did not continue on in the organization. I went home....where life was safe and comfortable. I got a job and began to work and just two years later, I found myself married and I began that part of my life. Since my separation and divorce, God has been writing this incredible story of my life. Along the way, I have met the MOST amazing people! Back in February, South Africa walked into my life and has been seeming to take over my heart in a "hectic"way. That's a word that my friend Trish uses all the time. She lives in Cape Town. Anyway... my heart has been growing for missions. And I don't believe it stops in South Africa. I believe that my heart is beatting for the brokenhearted ALL over the world! So what does that mean today?
I have a couple of dreams...my first one is to go to South Africa. I need to go and discover what God wants me to do. I need to meet my mentor, Wilma. I need to meet Trish, and if Westley were there...I would need to meet him to. These people mean the WORLD to me! They have challenged my life in ways that I have never imagined.
My second dream is this and the one that I would like to focus this blog upon......I have a longing to find the man of my dreams. I don't like being single- I won't lie. I wish I had the backing of another parent helping me to raise and discipline my daughters. I wish I had strong arms to wrap around me at night when I come home after working all day. I want someone to love on and spoil. I want to laugh and to dream with someone. I want to be in ministry with him. BUT....I want God more. Tonight I feel like God is asking something of me. I feel like God is asking me to lay this particular dream on the alter and to focus fully on my calling. He may OR may not give me this dream back. I may or may not end up with the man of my dreams. I am asking God to take me sooooo very deep in Him that I wouldn't miss this in my life! More than the other....this is a HUGE sacrafice for me. It means...I die to the fact that I would ever have anyone in my life. I don't want to live an ordinary life...I want to be GOD's Best...I want EXTRAORDINARY! So tonight...I'm before the Lord. I am laying down and relinquishing my right to a relationship. I am accepting the calling. I will go WHEREVER it is that He would ask me to go. I will do WHATEVER it is that He desires for me to do. Oh Lord, I ask for the NATIONS!!! That's the phrase that began this whole process. The desire of my heart to have a man in my life became an idol to me. I will NOT have ANY idols befor the Lord!!! I fix my gaze upon HIS glorious beauty and say....as much as I want that God.... I want YOU MORE!!!!!!!!
What about you?? Do you have something in your life that gets in the way of what God might call you to do? Take a good hard look....that is not easy to do! That means you gotta get really truthful with yourself. BUT the reward and the freedom and peace that comes is overwhelming! Soo...lay it down. Give it back to God and LIVE!!!!
You are loved beyond what you could ever dream or imagine!!
JOY ;)
